Heal the world, make it a better place, for you and for me and the entire human race. There are people dying, if you care enough for the living, make it a better place for you and for me. – Michael Jackson
A Vietnam veteran shared with me that Jane Fonda was unforgiveable for being in North Vietnam in 1972. The former soldier said that, “Fonda’s traitorous act…went unpunished, most likely because of who she was. I do not hate this woman. I am just disgusted at what she did. We have to make America great again.”
I appreciate that he could separate the person from her supposed actions at one level, but there was no self-reflection nor recognition that he was ordered to fight and kill in an undeclared war in a country who didn’t ask us to be there. He saw it like, “We were obedient to what we were told; we acted in that role; and thus our service is an honor.”
We all know that soldiers are taught and ordered to kill ‘the enemy’, someone they don’t even know on a personal level. They are trained to objectify others and think that it’s permissible because the upper chain of command says it’s their duty and an honor. Those authority figures, often in ‘leadership positions’, make the rules and orders for soldiers and civilians.
And at a certain level, it is somehow agreed upon that it’s acceptable for these orders to continue, either through carrying them out or being complacent in not speaking out, so wars continue. Those who do speak out–the whistleblowers, the protectors, the on-the-scene reporters, the citizens gathering to say ‘no’– are not looked upon in friendly ways by those who are or support the authority figures. If one mishap or mistake happens in reporting, the issue becomes vilified without hearing what fully occurred. And at this point, non-corporate media is called fake and being outlawed.
Interestingly, soon after this conversation with the vet, I had listened to Fonda speak about her involvement in North Vietnam, how it happened, how others perceived her actions, and the courage and process of supporting forgiveness. Of the many stories I’ve listened to of being judged by others without them knowing all the facts, it’s amazing what she was willing to do the work on her own healing and bring that into action in the world.
She courageously gathered Vietnam vets together, so she could actually hold space to listen to their pain, for all to be heard even in their anger and rage, to bring empathy to the forefront, and to be open to all that needed to be said. The authenticity of her story, the emotions I felt from her, were real and truthful, not acted.
I told the vet that I too was in Vietnam during the late 60’s and have a very different perception of why we were there. I still can’t speak to this experience publically, but I did share that I will not allow war mindsets and nationalistic fury to overtake empathy, true service, kindness, care and forgiveness. I expressed that no nation can be great when their heart is dissociated from love.
I didn’t get to this place of awareness in any easy way. I went through a very somatic and emotional experience in 1997 around forgiving my mother (who had been dead for years), someone I hated all my life up until that point. This was before I ever knew about ThetaHealing® Technique. That is when the depth, grace and release into forgiveness would forever change my life.
I experienced an overview of ‘downloaded’ TRUTH about our relationship that roared through my body and mind. I literally sobbed for hours. I think this is what Vianna (founder of ThetaHealing Technique) means by the virtue, ‘grace’, when she says it isn’t easy.
But then release came… fully. I hardly had words to express the freedom I felt. I felt completion in letting her go so we could both walk our own paths. I knew if this could happen through forgiving my mother, it could happen with and for anyone or anything.
When someone does something to us that feels unforgivable, we can experience many reactions—righteousness; harboring heavy feelings (often used as a boundary to protect us) but ends up as depression; express some kind of statement that we’ve been hurt and that another’s actions needs to be changed and be punished; feeling revengeful; or possibly wishing someone (or groups of people) ill will through our thoughts or actions.
We might think, “Why shouldn’t they have a taste of their own medicine?!” We might think that we need to make the other suffer or feel bad through our judgments, anger, hatred, resentment, revenge, internalized shame, and/or grudges, which are often denied. But to carry these feelings, depletes us even if we never see the person again.
Being willing to step into the process of forgiveness is to start the journey to release from someone else’s toxic or hurtful ways, and to look at what they have brought up for us…the ways we may have not forgiven ourselves, which they are reflecting.
What are the ways we might have hurt others due to the way we were hurt, the acting-out or projections?
We can end up as our own worst enemies. Forgiving ourselves is the same process as forgiving others and is essential in spiritual growth. We can exit any interaction, physically, emotionally, and mentally, without carrying these heavy emotions towards others…or against ourselves.
The forgiveness process has a timing piece, a willingness and readiness. It can occur quickly or take time to fully understand what actually happened to forgive. For some people, the later shows up as premature forgiveness or ‘forgiveness bypassing’. This can be due to repressed issues where not all has surfaced from the unconscious memories and is buried with the feelings and beliefs.
So the forgiveness is superficial until the information comes to the conscious mind. But even saying, “I forgive you” to yourself in reference to you or another when the process isn’t complete, is a powerful frequency which helps the disconnection and allows for protection to occur. It sends the heavy energy elsewhere.
And forgiveness is not about forgetting…or we’d lose the awareness. When we don’t journey into forgiveness though, we continue a connection to the other that we most want to be detached from at that time. We are sending our power and energetic chords to them, and we become drained. It works the opposite to what we think as protecting ourselves.
Forgiveness can most readily be best processed in our inner world through the ‘digging’ process. We allow the remembering and then process those emotions and feelings opening up space for expression, to be seen, heard, cared about, shown empathy towards, responded to sacredly…and then cleared by finding what we learned differently from what happened. This is the way to not only heal ourselves individually, but collectively.
Forgiveness doesn’t mean to not speak our truth about what occurred. We can do this through our own release and timing without blaming. We can do it without playing the role of the victim even if we were victimized. We can do it knowing that we have choices in whether to engage again, but this time without the burden and pain that another might have attempted to impose on us. It’s about the freedom to walk unencumbered from the past or current actions.
Forgiveness makes us lighter, healthier, more present in our lives. It readjusts our boundaries to fit our present state of being. Physically, it stops headaches, digestive issues, lowers blood pressure and cholesterol, relaxes muscles, increases oxygen intake. It can clear cancer and other diseases.
It really feels essential to create our lives where we can truly embody deep forgiveness, even clearing ancestral prejudices, which we all have. If we want to make the world a better place, healing and forgiveness supports that empowerment–of bringing the truth of our inner changes to the outer world utilizing courage, inner freedom, bravery, compassion and understanding.
The world is waiting for us. Are you ready?
Wishing each of you recognition of your courage,
I extracted possible ‘theme’ beliefs from the story. Energy test yourself for them, practice clearing them through digging if applicable, and use Creator’s teachings, including the ones below, if they fit.
*Orders from authority figures have to be carried out to know what honor is.
*Obedience to another’s command is a service to be honored.
*All people who are in positions of authority know more than me.
*Human laws have to be obeyed in order to feel accepting of myself.
*Judging another makes me right and another wrong.
*A righteous attitude gives me more ability to be ethical.
*I have to avoid forgiveness to keep a boundary with the person who (or situation that) hurt me.
*Everyone is forgivable.
Helpful Creator’s teachings/downloads
I know what it feels like to, how to, when to, that it’s possible, that I can, I do (or I am/am able to be):
*To be able to self reflect instead of blindly obey.
*To know the difference between virtues through Creator and human perceptions of virtues.
*To live without judging another to make me aware of the ethics I want to uphold
*To have ethics and ethical behavior through Creator
*To live without a righteous attitude to be ethical.
*The freedom of forgiveness
*To forgive and maintain the remembering
*To know the safety, courage, bravery in forgiveness
*To honor myself through Creator without needing outside approval
*To know that everyone and everything is forgivable.
[If you need more support in your process of forgiveness, please consider contacting the team for an appointment.]